Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Rise of a Family

Once upon a time in a galaxy not too far away there was a man, who had left his home country to seek his fortune abroad, and he happened to meet a woman, who also was traveling, because no soil had ever welcomed her roots.
And in the red glow of sunset, waves kissing the shore, when they both were breathing heavily, side by side on the beach, he said:"My name's Smorgasbord Farrago. Do you want to marry me?" And she smiled and said: "I am Melange, and yes, I do."
So they got married, and they lived on love alone, but that didn't buy them hifi-stereo systems, so they decided to start a catering service. And they named it "Mrs. Melange's", registered in the name of Smorgasbord Farrago, and it offered the best food in the business.
And before long they had four little girls, and their names were Selma, after the Simpsons character, Gundi, after Melange's grandmother, Galli, to honour Smorgasbord's ancestors, and Maufry, because they both liked that name. And the four girls grew to be four beautiful young women, and they worked as waitresses in their parent's business, and it flourished and all was well, because "Mrs. Melange's" had become the best catering service on the continent.
At the same time it came to pass that a quite different man rose to quite different fame and genius, and when he became the master he is today, he felt like eating good food, and so "Mrs. Melange's" was hired by him himself, genius among the gifted, gentleman among apes, big hard fuckin' metal rod among pencils, Brato Useba, and he's never been more healthy or better nourished since.
(Mrs. Melange's Catering: Call 1-800-FORMIDABLE)

And because caterers have sharp eyes and eager ears, NakNakOverThere has secretly contacted a member of the Farrago family, who provided the following insider information about Useba's latest projects.

M****y: I've seen at least 11 big files, it said "Breakfast" on one of them, so I opened it, you know, maybe I could see what Mr. Useba really finds delicious, so we could serve him better, but it was all sheet music and stuff... and then there was one called "Maggots", and I wondered if Mr. Useba was suddenly into Asian and African food, so I opened that file, too, but it was only evil words like poison and law suit. And there was a file with just "v.c." on it, but then I heard something from the hallway, and there was this...pain...in my neck and... I don't remember what happened after that. Where am I? How I did I get here? Who are you?

That's all poor M****y could tell NakNakOverThere before she suffered a nervous breakdown. She is currently under medical observation, and doctors keep telling everyone that they expect her to make a full recovery.
Her information, however, is valuable: There are at least 11 new songs, and one of them is called "v.c." How mysterious. Makes one wonder what it stands for.
Give us a revelation, oh Brato Useba! We kneel before you in the dust!

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